The Arizona Legislature voted today to sell the southern part of the state, south of the Gila River, to the highest bidder. The 29,760 square mile region is part of the Gadsden Purchase [right] acquired from Mexico in 1854. The goals are to help cover the state's budget shortfall, and according to the bill's sponsor, get rid of the state's highest concentration of latte-drinkers.
Plans are already underway to mine the bed of the Gila River to prevent southern Arizonans (Gadsdenians?) from trying to sneak north in search of 12-lane freeways and sprinklered lawns.
The region will be posted on eBay next week. Early reports are that bidders will include Mexico, the Sinaloa drug cartel, and Warren Buffet. T. Boone Pickens reportedly decided not to bid when he learned most of the groundwater has already been used.
And happy April Fool's Day.